INSOMNIA 2

Insomnia II

     So now as I write on what should be used for my dream pad, I am still left to wonder why. Then I remember what the voices of the children said. They said she hadn't slept for days. I remember her voice said she needed to leave them with someone there so they would be safe. I remember I was told she wanted to harm herself, and not anyone else. I recollect of hearing about her husband abusing her. Still even now, confused about what I heard and from who, and I'm not sure whats real.
     In the midst of thinking of a tragedy averted, all those years ago, I am still left wondering now of the truth of it all. I can't sleep because my mind is racing, triggering raw emotion, and in the end there will still be no answer.
     Right after it happened there was secrecy and innuendo, the spin zone was in full effect. Even I spun something in my mind to stay sane, and make everything all right. Had to keep going, pushing forward, moving on up,on to the next one. A way after the fact offer of some mental guidance came too late, the world and I had already moved on. Really though, since I'm writing this now, I didn't really move on. I just packed that bag and I still carry it with me.